What is your desire landscape?

A question I ask almost every woman who sits down with me is "What do you desire?" It more often than not is met with a blank stare, followed by shrugged shoulders and a "no idea."

The first time I asked myself this question all I could come up with was "I desire avocado toast."

What do you desire isn't about what's for dinner, or what you wish your partner would do differently, or what you wish your kids would stop doing. I mean the desire/want underneath all of that, the desire that turns you on. The one buried somewhere around the time you became the person responsible for everyone else's wants.

Most of the women I work with are doing a lot: running households, careers, marriages, school pickup lines, all of it. And somewhere in the middle of being that capable, desire just got filed under "later." Like a tab you meant to come back to.

Later doesn't show up on its own. I wish it did.

Here's the thing I keep relearning, in my own life and in every single room I sit in with these women: desire isn't a problem you need to fix, it's information. It's been trying to get your attention this whole time, just in a language nobody ever taught us to acknowledge. Pleasure. Power. Safety. Connection. Meaning. It shows up as restlessness. Irritability. That craving you can't quite name, a body that's gone kind of quiet on you. We call all of that a symptom. It's actually a map.

I call it the Desire Landscape.

It's the actual terrain of you, the parts you've smoothed over so you'd be easier to live with, easier to love, easier to manage. And under all that smoothing? There's a whole landscape still very much alive in there, just waiting for someone to take it seriously for once.

I'm not going to lay the whole thing out here. Honestly, some things need to be experienced and embodied with someone who can meet you there. This is one of those things.

But I'll tell you this much. You are not too much. You're not broken, or behind, or past some window that closed on you. You're awake. And there's a really specific reason why. If any of that landed somewhere in your chest just now, that's not nothing. That's the first signal on the map.

Meet with me and let's find out what the rest of it says.